Once again TSGT reigns victorious with an early win to kick first and a soon after ball-camera-face incident that left Sports Cap’n incapacitated & bloody until his first at bat (bunt single plus eventual run). Go Sports Resilience!
Bloody cap’n aside, it is presumed that some manner of kickball was executed during Sports Cap’n’s less woozy portions of the evenings. From Cap’n’s best recollections, there were several 6-run bunt home runs as well as at least 3-4 RBI pop flies. Plus team brown. Either way, I’m sure we won with points.
NAGMA offered fair play and shiny jerseys to the fray in this no-holds-barred kickball match involving not one but two teams hellbent on foot-driven dominance. While TSGT brought vigor, chutzpah, and pure smite-factor, they forgot to bring the cohesive sports net required to effectively quarantine in humanitarian fashion.
Thus fingers were in but hands were not; the forest contained no trees. The win was inverse.
I think we can squarely blame several things if we’re slinging any perceived room for improvement in last night’s 1-12 inverse victory.
Here they are in no particular order, despite the numbers appearing to left of each:
- Alex forgot to come.
- You forgot Buttons! We need Sun of Gary! MVP 2000!
- Jeremy & Mo were unavailable by cel phone to give us 12 points. (ps, we have your shirts!)
- Subway sandwiches weren’t grilled adequately
- TSGT shirts were so awesome that they inspired the other team to greatness
- Sports Cap’n forgot his kicky shoes
- Defense wins championships. Inverse defense (the Sieveski Approach) wins inverse victories.
- Bacon deficit (though familia Burns’ cow meat was mighty in girth)
- Lack of shiny pants
- Lack of manbunts
At least we succeeded in frustrating team A.R.T.D. in our drunken umping aka drumping efforts. All I have to say is that if I’m gonna get paid in the form of an entire sixer of Maibock in my belly that I bought myself, you’re gonna get what you pay for.
In OTHER news,
At my house was left a blue windbreaker & some black sunglasses — Monty? Anyone?
FINALLY,
there will be no more use of all-caps in this email.
Despite Old Salty’s best attempts, we got trounced by the St Paul natives. Why they’re playing in Minneapolis is beyond me. Clearly they must be afeared of playing the big kickers in Capital City, such as “We Put the FU back in Fun“
Beyond high stakes belligerence, we had a fair amount of self degradation afoot. Competitiveness and Blame were tossed about like so many half-inflated beach balls, until at last we drowned in a sea of our own beach balls. We vow to find new scapegoats and focus less on the negative & more on the customer!
